Tuesday, February 14, 2012

Parenting True Story



Yesterday Kya and I get home from work and preschool.  We walk in in the door not even 5 mins later she is dishing to her brother.

I hear –

Khari: She cursed in school, what did she say?
(Now mind you, I’ve been in the car with this chic for a good 20 minutes, another 20 in Walmart, not one word to me.  But I do love that she can share with her brother)

Me & Haik: Who cursed?
Kya: Ashley (the names in this story has been changed to protect the innocent)

Haik: Well what did she say?

Crickets…nothing.

Now mind you, Kya is the girl at school who follows all the rules.  She will brawl with her brothers, go WORD for WORD with me and Haik, give major sass to Chalana, but at school, angel status, she is not looking for trouble from the authorities.

Me: Did she say @ss? (now I’m using my lips but not saying the words)
Kya: No.

Me: Did she say sh*t? (still using my lips but not saying the words)
Kya: No.

Now I’m stumped, please tell me this child did not drop the F* bomb in preschool?

Kya: She said, “Damn I lost my sparkle”

Chuckle.  Well alrighty. 

In my head, I’m thinking, wow Ashley knows how to cuss.  Right context and everything.  My mother and my middle sister both cussers.  My sister has been a cusser since she was about 4 or 5.  Seriously, full on potty mouth action, so I know the type.

Haik or Khari: Who heard her?
Kya: Me and Jennie
Haik: Did anyone tell?
Kya: Well Jennie was gonna tell the teacher, but she wouldn’t let us.

Room stands still, we are all looking at each other now.  She wouldn’t let us?  Hold the phone.

Haik: What do you mean she wouldn’t let you? 
Kya: She stood in the way.
Me: So Ashley is the boss
Kya: Yep. (shaking her head in agreement)

Now there is more to the story and with it I end up trying to explain to Kya that this is not right, this is not the way friends are supposed to roll – there has been an ongoing DAILY discussion about Ashley and I’ve seen Kya’s behavior changing (for the worse).

But Kya has not been hearing me.  So last night, I busted out the big guns and used works like, ‘sucker’ and ‘bossypants’…(don’t judge me, I’m trying to save my child from a life of being a follower)

This conversation did not happen with the boys until middle school, Kya is 5, girls are so dang fast.  

In the end, I always end up “keeping it really real” with my kids, and by keeping it real, I mean either yelling, profanity (sometimes), harsh words (i.e. sucker, wack, lame) and real life scenarios cause the sugar coating fails me – every.single.time.

Is it just me? I only have my parents and family life as an example, but I would love to hear how your parents reached you.


Thanks for dropping in.

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